Advertising: Assessment LR
Advertising and Marketing assessment feedback: WWW: Well done Aman, this is a superb essay – keep this up! It is so refreshing to read such detailed analysis and I can clearly see that you are really trying to consider the changing idea of masculinity in the media. You have shown a real engagement of both advertising CSPs as you seamlessly reference both throughout your essay. The amount written may be difficult to recreate during an exam but this is a fantastic starting point and also beneficial for revision purposes. EBI: The main concern I have is the structure of your essay – you have strong understanding of both CSPs coupled with theory however there is a slight concern that you sometimes move too far away from the question focus. It would be in your favour if each paragraph had a more clear and relevant topic sentence that uses an occasional key word from the question. Your introduction and conclusion does this well but I think somewhere in between it gets lost and becomes too d...